The Colposcopy Tales

The first half of this week I was mostly attending hospital appointments. Yes, I know this isn't the usual blog fodder. There will be no photos (you should be very, very thankful for that) but I wanted to document it anyway because I think people should talk more about this stuff. 

Why did I have to go to hospital? I had my second ever smear test just after my birthday. I'm a good girl and book them up every three years like I should, before I even get the letter. I didn't think anything of it - the first one was fine and the actual test went well. The nurse even told me I had a 'textbook cervix' which was a nice, if not slightly odd, compliment. 

Fast forward a week and a letter of suspect thickness landed on my doormat. I knew instantly it wasn't the usual 'you're fine; see you in three years' letter as I could feel a leaflet in the envelope. Leaflets are a bad sign. I'd been called to have a colposcopy due to 'low grade dyskaryosis'. I correctly surmised that this is better than 'high grade dyskaryosis' so, you know, off to a winner. 

The next part was the hardest - waiting. It took around six weeks from getting the letter to having the appointment. It would have been slightly earlier, but you can't have it done when you have your period, and guess when they'd scheduled my appointment for? Yup. In the meantime I'd also gone to the doctor about some pain I'd be having, so she also wanted me to have some ultrasound tests done (one on my tummy, and one...in...) and I had to make sure they were done before and not after the colposcopy, as the colposcopy would likely cause me to bleed, which wasn't going to be pleasant for anyone involved. 

So, the tests. 

Monday's ultrasounds went ok. Apparently I have a fibroid on my uterus that needs monitoring. It's a fairly big 'un and I'm not sure exactly how often this monitoring needs to take place. I'm hoping they're going to write to me on that one. 

Tuesday....unpleasant. There's nothing cool about having a guy stare up you with binoculars for 20 minutes, occasionally poking around. My least favourite part was when he asked the nurse for the "biopsy tweezers". Ouch. Getting me to cough as he took the biopsies did little to distract me from the fact he was plucking bits if my insides out. But the worst bit by far was the silver nitrate he applied to the biopsy sites. Ouch and double ouch. But probably for the best to avoid any nasties (infected cervix, anyone?).

Now I just need to wait for the results which should tell me if my mutant cells are CIN1 or 2 - 1 means they'll likely leave them alone and see if they disappear by themselves, 2 means a little procedure to lop off the bottom of my cervix. I'm trying not to think too much about that... 

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