My ‘secret’ roomie (Part One)

So, in case you didn’t already know (like you miss it with posts like this and this and this), me and the boy moved in together just over a month ago. What you probably didn’t know, because I haven’t told anyone (except my Action Learning Set – I don’t know why, I got carried away), is that as well as sharing my home with the boy, a stuffed penguin that is his, but winds up being my cuddle buddy every night, and a whole host of junky pine furniture that belongs to our landlord, I’m also sharing a house with an engagement ring.

My engagement ring. Except it’s not mine, not yet. And not for a looooong time, apparently.

Wait – what? How do I know? Did I find it? Is he gonna propose?!


Let me tell you a story… all about how my life got flip turned upside down…

I’ll break it down for you.

During one of my many jaunts among the world of the internet, I saw a pretty ring online, and told Matt “ooh, this is preeeetty. If you ever propose I’d like a ring like that”. I probably said it more than once. I probably said it a million times, actually. Anywho, Matt mentioned going to look at it ‘in real life’ a couple of times, but I was a bit reticent at first as I wanted a whole big romantic surprise when the time came. BUT... I am a MASSIVE control freak. While I love the romance of having no idea what my engagement ring will one day look like, I am also terrified of hating it, having to pretend I love it forever, and always looking at it thinking “I was it was a bit bigger/smaller/rounder/squarer/whatever-er”. Yes, I know how shallow that sounds. But, despite my protestations (even on the way there), we went to see it.

It was love. I can’t even explain why. When we went to see it they hadn’t even polished it, so the metal looked dull and grey and the stone wasn’t as shiny as it could have been, and my fingers were all hot from the excitement of it all so it basically looked like a piece of tin strangling a sausage. I tried on prettier rings, rings with more delicate and ‘perfect’ metalwork, rings with bigger, shinier diamonds that looked more ‘princess-ey’. But I’m not a princess-ey kinda girl. Yes, I’m a magpie who cannot walk past a tray of sparkly things. Yes, I do like the finer things in life. But I’m not a princess. I like imperfections. As a child I’d always pick the stuffed toy that had the wonky eyes, or choose the no-name Barbie impersonator who looked unloved. And so I fell for the ring.

But we walked away. The metalwork wasn’t great, the ring was more expensive than either of us anticipated him paying for an engagement ring and, while we knew we wouldn’t find the same ring elsewhere, we thought we might be able to find something different but lovelier.

I spent the next couple of days in turmoil. I bored Matt stupid weighing up the relative pros and cons of the Magic Ring, as I started calling it (because it had some sort of strange draw for me…) – was it nice enough? What if I got it and then wanted something else? Matt called it “shabby” and I got annoyed, defending it, but I still couldn’t quite commit.

knew I loved it deep down, but I was also really worried about the price. I didn’t want Matt to feel he had to spend that much on a ring, and I didn’t want my loving it to make him feel pressured into stretching himself financially. So I down-played my love for the Magic Ring and agreed that yes, it was a bit shabby and yes, we could probably find better elsewhere.

Then someone bought it. 

Matt copied me in to an email he’d got from the jeweller, and his response:

Thanks for letting me know Jade,

That’ll teach me for being indecisive.

Thanks very much for all your help.



Hi Matthew,

I hope this finds you well. I just wanted to let you know that the ring you were looking at, the 1.46 Carat Fancy Yellow, has now sold. I do hope you didn’t have your heart set on it. If anything at all similar comes in, I will be contact to give you first refusal.

Kind Regards,



I was MAD. At Matt, for not being quick enough to buy it, and myself for not being decisive and making it clear how much I loved it. I tried to pretend I didn’t care, but I was grumpy for the rest of the day and had a little secret cry to mourn the loss of the Magic Ring, meanwhile wondering whether I could somehow track down the purchaser and bribe them to sell it to me, and what kind of coercive force that might necessitate.  

Wow, this story is LONG. Stay tuned for the next part! Yup, I’m breaking it into two posts. Try not to die from the suspense of waiting for Part Two.

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